Our club meets

Every Tuesday evening that school is in session.

PLACE: Rothesay High School (Library) in Rothesay, New Brunswick. Just a short drive from Saint John.

TIME: Tuesdays, 7:-00 pm - 9:05 pm

NOTE: There are no meetings on storm days or school holidays.

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A Dirty Little Journey

Speech #4: “A Dirty Little Journey”
by Jennifer Beach

Objectives

Select the right words and sentence structure to communicate your ideas clearly, accurately and vividly. Use rhetorical devices to enhance and emphasize ideas. Eliminate jargon and unnecessary words. Use correct grammar.

Speech

December 19th, 2005 – it was the first day of my Christmas vacation. It was also the beginning of an 18 month journey filled with:

• poopy pants,
• soiled floors,
• dirty clothes – that included my own! and of course - my favourite -
• debating pseudonyms for private parts.

Yes, this journey was teaching my son how to go to the potty.

Who ever thought that teaching a child to use the bathroom would be so difficult?

It’s been 18 months since I started this journey. And we’re just now approaching the finish line. The start was exciting and fun but by the end I realized how great it would be if amongst the thousands of books, movies, chairs and other potty gimmicks out there that one would have warned me about what really happens when you try to potty train your child. Let me share with you the top 5 things I have learned on this journey.

Keep the Cheerios on the table, not in the toilet.
Toilet training wasn’t working. So my friend said, “Why don’t you play the Cheerios game. Put some Cheerios in the toilet. Then get Matthew to pee on them.” I tried it. Much to my surprise it worked. This method did have its drawback. Matthew thought it was fun - but he refused to go potty unless I put Cheerios in the toilet. Okay…so I had to continue to put Cheerios in the potty that would be ok if it made him go to the bathroom. Until one day while eating breakfast at a local restaurant … Matthew said to the waitress, “Did you pee on my Cheerios?” My husband slowly sunk into his chair. I frantically explained why Matthew asked the question. Fortunately for me, the waitress laughed. I learned that peeing on Cheerios may be effective at first but after a few times it causes much confusion at the breakfast table.

Naming your private parts anything other than their actual name can be a big no no!
Referring to private parts is a necessity when training a child to go to the potty. What do you call them? You have to call them something. I insisted on using the proper name. My husband, on the other hand, called it Matthew’s bird. This didn’t cause any problems until we were at a family picnic for my work. One of the Partners’ wives decided to play a game with the children. “Children, what can we find now? I know, let’s all find Big Bird!” Well, Matthew knew where big bird was and he fought with Partners’ wife until yet again I had to explain that THAT was not THE Big Bird she was looking for.

Peeing in the great outdoors is sometimes called for but be sure to explain it is for emergency purpose only…
Walking the Irving Nature Park is something my husband and I do quite frequently in the summer. One after noon while walking Matthew said “Mommy I have to pee?” Can you hold it I asked? As there was no wash room near by “NO Mommy NOW” he responded so he had his first tinkle in the great outdoors. Three day later I was BBQ on the back deck and Matthew was playing on his swing set. I turned away for only a moment I turned back only to find Matthew with his pants around his ankles watering the neighbours newly planted oak tree. “Mommy….I peed on the tree” he giggled and yet again I had to explain that when you are in the back yard you come in the house to pee and that you don’t pee outside.

Always - and I mean always - be sure that your child is wearing some sort of undergarment.
One evening my son had a little accident just before bath time, instead of putting clean clothes on him I decided that I would let him go with out pants for the next 15 minutes or so. After about 10 minutes he came in to the living room sporting a rather confused expression. I asked him if he had to go to the washroom and he responded with a matter of fact look on his face “No, mommy that’s okay I already did … come and see.” I followed only to find a large mess in the middle of the kitchen floor. When I asked him why he didn’t go to the bathroom he said “but mommy I didn’t poop my pants.”

The last and most important lesson I have learned over the past 18 months is that children can control two things in their life eating and going to the bathroom. Control is not something they give up easily.

Over the past three years and 10 months I have slowly learned that having children is a privilege that we should all take time to enjoy. As parents we tend to stress out about many things because of what other may think. For myself and many others, having a 3.5 year old in diapers is one of these things. After struggling with my patience, my concern over others thoughts and a lot of messes I now believe that as long as a child does not have a medical problem giving them time and patience is the best way to train your child to go to the potty. No matter what proven process you use it is my opinion that they will get it when they are ready and not until.

Thanks you and good luck as you face this dirty little journey.